SIDHUISM

1. The Indian team without Sachin is like giving a kiss without a squeeze.
2. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child in a topless bar!
3. Statistics are like bikinis... what they reveal is suggestive, what they hide is essential.
4. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it’s that of an oncoming train which will run them over.
5. All that comes from a cow is not milk.
6. I lean on statistics like a drunken man leans on a lamppost, only for support, not illumination.
7. Wickets are like wives… you never know which way they will turn!
8. He looks like a brooding hen over a China egg!
9. It is very difficult to kill a man who is hell-bent on committing suicide!
10. He is as innocent as a freshly laid egg!
11. The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same reason.
12. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.
13. The wily fox is back… it is an ill omen when a fox licks the lambs.
14. When you are dining with the demons, you’ve got to have a long spoon!
15. If ‘ifs and buts’ were ‘pots and pans’ there would be no tinkers!
16. The ball went so high it could have got an airhostess on its way down!
17. This Indian team is like bicycles in a cycle stand… one falls and the entire row falls!
18. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taxi meter.
19. The batsman is like a three-wheeler. Sucks a lot of fuel, but cannot go beyond 30.
20. Just because a rose smells sweet, you do not use it in the soup.
21. The Indian cricket board is like vessel that leaks from the top.
22. Indian openers are like envelopes – they don’t take you anywhere.
23. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.
24. Kenya in South Africa was like a mountain having labour pains.
25. The batsman is as comfortable on this pitch as a bum would be on a porcupine.
26. Deep Dasgupta is not a wicket keeper, he is a goal keeper. He must be given a free transfer to Manchester United.
27. A big outcry but no outcome!
28. One, who doesn’t throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.
29. He is a wily fox. But, if we make the fox run, the chicken will become hen.
30. The Only Thing You Get In Life Without Trying is dandruff.
31. If the heavens throw you dates, you got to keep your mouth open.
32. When you have a hen laying eggs you should not mind the cackle.
33. Money is like manure. It is not good until it is spread around.
34. Umpire Eddie Nichols is a man who can’t find his buttocks with his two hands.
35. Beware of the naked man who offers you his shirt.
36. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent him back and Dravid was runout in the third test against the West Indies at Barbados." Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope."
37. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
38. Spit on your hands! Take the black flag! And start slitting throats!
39. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend, that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world which does not have wings!
40. The ball whizzes past like a bumble bee and the Indians are in the sea.
41. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin in a haystack.
42. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.
43. You cannot make Omelets without breaking the eggs.
44. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.
45. Anybody can pilot a ship when the sea is calm.
46. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
47. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.
48. The cat with gloves catches no mice.
49. Age has been perfect fire extinguisher for flaming youth.
50. Fattest pigs go to the butcher first.
51. Good intentions die unless utilized.
52. He has a backlift like an octopus falling out of a tree, all over the place.
53. Come to my parlour said the spider to the fly.
54. A dog kennel is no place to hide a sausage.
55. You can never unscramble eggs.
56. Call the bear uncle until you are safely across the bridge.
57. "He's wallowing in foolishness like a rhino in an African pool."
58. 'In the orchard of opportunity, you can't wait for the fruit to drop'
59. They are so timid, they wouldn't say boo to a goose
60. There is always free cheese in a mousetrap
61. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg
62. A fallen lighthouse is more dangerous than a reef.
63. A revolutionary idea is usually one with its sleeves rolled up.
64. After marriage, the other man's wife looks more beautiful.
65. Crowd's gathered outside my home at 3am, and my wife was so worried she called the police, but it was simply jubilant fans congratulating her for marrying a national hero.
66. Even a cock crows over his own dunghill.
67. I am a sepoy and will follow the guidance of my leaders.
68. I have seen many ladies displaying different styles and different styles displaying ladies.
69. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. And venture belongs to the adventurous.
70. The gap between the bat and pad is so much that I would have driven a car through it!
71. We are all Adam's children - it's just the skin that makes all the difference.
72. We'll take the cake with the red cherry on top.
73. You can't play a symphony alone, it takes an orchestra to play it.
74. You can take the tiger out of the jungle, but u can’t take the jungle out of the tiger
75. The world is all about mind and matter, I don’t mind and you don’t matter..........
76. Bad habits are like comfy beds - easy to get into, very difficult to get out of.
77. You aren’t rewarded for having brains, you’re rewarded for using them.
78. A lemon squeezed too hard yields a bitter juice.
79. Hope is putting faith to work when doubting would be easier.
80. Curry is a worry.
81. Liquor talks mighty loud when it’s let loose from the jug.
82. To achieve, you have to believe.
83. Success is the fruit of concentration.
84. Strike when the iron is hot, and make the iron hot by striking.
85. Strength grows in the garden of patience.
86. Gamblers are like toilets - broke one day, flush the next.
87. Your originality is your strength.
88. If you enjoy a particular thing, you will always succeed at it.
89. The bill was buzzing past the head like a bumblebee breaking wind.
90. Winning is not important, but wanting to win is.
91. When you are submerged up to your ears in trouble, try using the part that isn’t submerged.
92. Faith in your abilities will help you face the music, even if you don’t like the tune.
93. Even a turtle won’t move until he sticks his neck out.
94. The doghouse is no place to keep a sausage.
95. Penny and penny will make many.
96. Every dog is a lion at his own door.
97. Even a cock crows over his own dung heap.
98. A good lather is half the shave.
99. Disappointments need to be cremated, not embalmed.
100. Those openers are like nappies, and changed for the same reason.
101. A tree is always known by its fruit.
102. The blood of the soldier gives glory to the general.
103. Troubles are like babies - the more you nurse them, the bigger they grow.
104. The first blow is half the battle.
105. A recession is where you have to tighten your belt.
106. A depression is where you have no belt to tighten.
107. When you have no pants to hold up, it is time to panic.
108. Next to good judgement, diamonds and pearls are the next rarest thing.
109. When everything is coming your way, you might just be in the wrong lane of traffic.
110. It is choice, not chance that determines destiny.
111. Fine feathers make a fine bird.
112. Flattery is like chewing gum, you chew it for a while, don’t swallow it - and after a while, spit it out!
113. Every time a lamb bleats, it loses a mouthful of hay.
114. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
115. Judge people by their performance, not by their intentions.
116. A true professional is like a chameleon - he will change colour to suit his surroundings.
117. Easy to criticise an egg, difficult to lay one.
118. Keep feeding your faith until your doubts starves to death.
119. Experience is the thing you get right after you need it.
120. When you’re running with the big dogs, you can’t piddle like a puppy.
121. They are like brooding hens on top of a china egg.
122. It is better to pluck the fruit from the tree than wait for it to fall.
123. You’ve got to put the saddle on the right horse.
124. Call the bear uncle until you cross his bridge.
125. Character isn’t made in a crisis, but it is shown in one.
126. Success is a matter of luck and pluck.
127. Big boast, small roast.
128. In times of prosperity, remember it’s the fattest pig that goes to the butcher.
129. The whole world is not cleaned by soft soap.
130. Good deeds speak for themselves, the tongue only speaks of their eloquence.
131. Speed has little to do with your progress - it is more to do with direction.
132. If fate gives you a lemon, make lemonade.
133. There is a devil in every berry of the grape.
134. Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.
135. The only thing you can get in a hurry is trouble.
136. Hope is the elixer of life.
137. Wallowing in foolishness like a rhinoceros in an African bog.
138. A man who is heading nowhere is sure to reach his destination.
139. He’s like a tornado - he can really blow you off your feet.
140. Commonsense is the knack of seeing things as they are and doing things as they need to be done.
141. A pessimist is one who burns bridges before the enemy gets to them.
142. He who ceases to praise ceases to prosper.
143. This is a batsman who is as eratic as the electricity supply in most parts of India.
144. You can take the tiger out of the jungle, but you can’t take the jungle out of the tiger.
145. He looks at the umpire as innocent as a freshly laid egg.
146. Were “if’s” and “buts” pots and pans there would be no tinkers.
147. The batsman is like an Indian three-wheeler - sucking a lot of diesel but can’t go beyond 30.
148. It’s not the early bird that gets the worm, it’s the smart one.
149. Don’t die until you’re dead.
150. He has either got to tighten his belt or lose his pants.
151. To catch a trout, you must be prepared to lose a fly.
152. Patience is the greatest of all shock-absorbers.
153. Ideas are funny things - they don’t work unless you do.
154. Some students will drink from the fountain of knowledge - others will simply gargle.
155. To error is human - but not too often.
156. If you want your hen to lay, you have to bear the cackling.
157. You can’t prevent the consequences of your mistakes.
158. There’s free cheese in a mousetrap.
159. A fallen lighthouse is more dangerous than a reef.
160. It is tiny droplets of water that make a shower. He’s believing his doubt and doubting his belief.
161. You always make your own luck.
162. In life, as in chess, it is foresight which will win.
163. A small leak can sink a big ship.
164. His mind is on the boisterous sea of doubt.
165. A good example is the best sermon you can ever preach.
166. Talent is nothing if it’s not controlled, harnessed and disciplined.
167. Failure is a better teacher than success, but it will seldom get an apple.
168. The weakness of your opposition is your strength.
169. When you are an anvil, hold yourself still.
170. When you’re a hammer, strike your fill.
171. They’re trying to make a whistle sound like a trumpet.
172. The older you get, the better you get - unless you’re a banana.
173. The darker the berry, the sweeter the juice.
174. The longer the rope, the tighter the noose.
175. The world is all about mind and matter; I don't mind and you don't matter.
176. If one-day cricket was pyjama cricket, then Twenty20 is underwear cricket.
177. He's shredded that into smithereens.
178. All that comes from a cow is not milk.
179. Beauty even when silent is eloquent.
180. That ball went so high it could have got an air hostess down with it !!
181. A fifty is like kissing a virgin, you just have to go on!

ISM

JABAL SHAMS

Indian team winnin WC.